I have just been diagnosed with sleep apnea, and am in my first month of receiving treatment.
Since my partner became pregnant with my youngest daughter (who is now 6 years old) I have been a very heavy snorer.
As a result of this she has slept in my daughters room since conception.
All I can do is offer a sufferers perspective, which on face value might seem self centered.
I cannot say that it is all her fault. For me personally the condition changed my as a person. I when from a fairly mild mannered man to a very impatient, depressed guy, who due to the condition also lost his "mojo" if you know what I mean.
As a sufferer I feel that as a result of this that I am no longer loved, our sex life is now non existent, and although she is now supportive of my treatment I personally feel like we are just co-existing in the same house.
I am also a type 2 diabetic, and every time I would attend the doctors surgery I was told that my symptoms were a result of the diabetes.
I am now on diabetic medication, anti depressants, and anti cholesterol medication
Things have started to change due to what I perceive to be a "lucky" break.
When I finally could not function as normal and attended another appointment at my surgery I happened to see a locum doctor instead of my own.
Immediately I described the symptoms to her she advised my that she thought I was suffering from sleep apnea, and started the ball rolling for diagnoses and treatment.
Had I seen my normal doctor I could still be ignorant to a condition I may have had for many years.
I urge you to try and carry on if you can, for the sake of your relationship.
You mention that your husband often doesn't go to bed before 2/3am, is it not possible for you to go to bed before him and try and get at least 2 or 3 hours of restful sleep before he comes to bed?
Also a good friend of mine tried cpap treatment and couldn't get on with it. In the end he had a permanent tracheotomy which has completely changed his life. When he goes to bed he removes his tube, and replaces it when he wakes.
As a result he no longer snores, or needs cpap.
Hope this helps,